A letter: Baby C, before we meet you

Posted on | April 4, 2014 | 2 Comments

Sweet little soul,

I've carried a tradition of writing to your sister before she was even conceived and throughout her life (see the tag 'letter' below) so I'd like to continue this with you.  There's nothing I love more than reading over her letters & seeing how quickly and much she's grown.  I know it'll go just as quick with you.

It's hard to believe we get to meet you in 2 weeks, give or take!  There's something so different about not knowing your gender this time around, as we found out at 16 weeks with your big sister.  My gut sort of says you're a boy, but I think it's only because we've had a boy name picked out longer.  Hazel tells me that you're her brother, and she tells daddy that you're her sister.  Grandma thinks you're a girl, and your Aunt Jamie thinks you're a boy.  Dad still hasn't made a guess... he's a practical guy and says 50/50.  I bet he's right, haha!


This pregnancy has been very similar, but oh so different at the same time.  Your big sisters pregnancy was full of fear after years of infertility.  On the flip side, you came so easily, an early August wonderful surprise.  Your sister was with me when I took the test on a whim - your dad downstairs visiting with your granddad who had just arrived.  I kept in quiet in front of granddad, as it was very hard to believe!  Your pregnancy has gone very quickly in comparison to the first - chasing a toddler around will do that. It's amazing how much less sleep and relaxation I've gotten this pregnancy, yet I still feel pretty great.  I'm guessing you'll be bigger than Hazel was - she was a mere 6 lb 14 oz - but this time you just feel a bit bigger than you sister was at 37 weeks.  People have asked if you're twins, breech, etc... and the odd comments just keep coming.  If this pregnancy has taught me anything it's what to say (and NOT to say) to a pregnant woman.  For future reference the only thing that's allowed is "you're carrying beautifully" ... :)


Speaking of beautiful, I'm trying to enjoy these last few weeks of being pregnant as it's most likely that last time.  I'm so eager to meet you but at the same time I realize I have the rest of my life to get to know you, and that we'll never be as physically close as we are now.  A friend of mine just had a miscarriage this week, and the raw emotion of loss and infertility came back to me, again making me realize how incredibly blessed I am to have conceived again (this time without assistance).  There is no greater bond than carrying a child, and I am thankful for you and my body.  Too many people take that for granted.


You kick a lot when your sister is loud, and your awake time is in the late evening.  Despite being a maternity nurse for 7 years I still have the hardest time figuring out which body part of yours is sticking out - you always kick back when I touch you, a sweet game I adore.  Hazel loves to touch you, but just as quickly will cover up my belly and say "bye bye" - a habit that can't continue once you're here, haha!  I think you kick and move a lot more than your sister did.  Hazel also loves to call you 'April' and 'Purple' ... yesterday she called you 'Taco' in remembrance of me spilling a burrito all over you the day before (she often tells me I'm a "mess" while pointing at my belly).  She also loves to kiss you good night before naps and bedtime, always making sure daddy does too.


I've been having a lot of practice waves recently, and I feel as if you've already dropped.  I am very excited for your birth - I envision a morning/afternoon birth, home in time for spending the evening with your big sis.  Obviously I know may not happen, but I'm doing hypnobabies again and try to visualize your birth often.  I think it'll be quick, and maybe even a little early.  We'll soon see - I'm happy with anything as long as you're healthy.


I love you already my sweet baby, see you very soon!

Momma

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