Serendipity

Posted on | March 20, 2015 | 1 Comment

This week has been a week of sickness. You know the type -- it's the beginning of spring and you think you're in the clear from all the late winter nastiness out there when BAM suddenly the kids are up crying and puking at night, of course hours after you've put freshly laundered sheets on the beds (seriously). Dad & I had to take a day off due to this double trouble and we decided yesterday a car nap was the best way to get actual long naps in them since they had both been sleeping and napping so poorly due to congestion. So we hopped in the car and headed upriver, giant coffees in hand.

We ended up at a spot that we discovered when we first explored Western Oregon looking to move here -- it's a place we camped at many times sans kids, staying up drinking local ale and listening to Death Cab for Cutie, a tarp over our campsite as a effort to stay dry (Oregon camping, duh). I remember sitting on this riverbank wishing for babies, as we had been trying to conceive to no avail for about two years at the time. I remember the lyrics 'I need you so much closer' I was listening to one day while watching B fish, and it was exactly how I felt about these future babies of mine. The ache was so raw, so consuming. Now here I am, 5 years later, with two sweet girls who watch their daddy fish from this same spot.

Some days it all feels so serendipitous. We were always where we needed to be but simply didn't see it. We discovered one another as man and wife longer than some get to have. We moved twice, went on some amazing adventures, & bought a home in the country we may not have found had our path been gone differently. It's hard to see those lovely consequences in the midst of infertility.

And guess what? Waking up to this river with our little backstory was just what the girls needed. Their runny noses and congestion were no match for the beautiful sounds of mother nature, the calm they truly needed. They played in the sand and hiked in the forest, giggling and singing like the happy souls they are. And I was left feeling whole, as if my life was leading up to this moment, middle of the night vomiting and all. Because life is what you make it. And mine, well it is simply beautiful.

Category: babywearing , Love , marriage , Motherhood , Nature , Oregon , sisters

Waiting:

Posted on | April 12, 2014 | 3 Comments

April has been amazing thus far. The weather has been fantastic, some days up to mid 70's, and it's keeping my impatience at bay. We've had bonfires, grill outs, early easter celebration, and some fantastic hikes! I'm sorry Michigan, but it makes me miss you even less.

B brought Hazel fishing the other evening after we had a picnic. It was so special to witness, and she had absolutely no fear and even gave the fish a kiss before releasing it.

On the pregnancy front, I'm feel somewhere between absolutely loving these last days of pregnancy and loathing them, as I cannot wait to meet this new little love. I've had a lot more braxton hicks this time around, and for weeks I've had a feeling that he or she is coming early. I'm only 5 days away from my due date as of today, so perhaps my gut is wrong? I cannot believe it's almost here. After spending years trying with Hazel, her pregnancy seemed longer in a sense. This baby just continues to surprise me (so perhaps it's a girl, as I've been guessing boy?). Either way, raspberry leaf tea and EPO are my friend right now. In Hazel's words - "baby come OUT!"

Hopefully the next update will be a sweet picture of the new addition. Wishing you all a blessed weekend!

Category: April , Birth , Nature , pregnancy

This moment: Wishes

Posted on | April 11, 2014 | 1 Comment

{this moment}

A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. Inspired by SouleMama

Category: Nature , spring , this moment , toddler

December 16

Posted on | December 16, 2013 | 2 Comments

{the sunlight on our property in the winter months in phenomenal - and lucky us, we're usually just far enough away from town to get sun and not fog & clouds like all our friends}

ps: remember DPP two years ago? similar photo!

Category: Homesteading , Nature , Oregon , Photo project , Photography

December 15

Posted on | December 15, 2013 | No Comments

{river kid through and through}

Category: Nature , Oregon , Photo project , toddler

December 12

Posted on | December 12, 2013 | 3 Comments

{"I choose to listen to the river for a while, thinking river thoughts, before joining the night and the stars" -Edward Abbey}

Category: Nature , Oregon , Photo project , river

A letter: 19 months

Posted on | September 16, 2013 | 1 Comment

My sweet baby Hazel,

My oh my, how is it your over a year and a half old? I look back at your previous letters from time to time, and it truly is amazing how quickly time flies.

You've had quite the summer, and now it's heading into fall. Throughout the summer you camped quite a bit - in the high cascades, on the high desert Metolius river, on the foothills on the Mckenzie River, and on the coast. You are still happiest in nature my love. You also took a trip to Michigan to visit grandma and your Aunt Jamie over the 4th of July, spending every single day being a beach bum. It reminded me of my childhood. All in all you've been on 12 plane rides since birth!

Your last letter mentioned you were walking everywhere. Well now, you're running everywhere, and climbing everything. You're still kind of clumsy (ahem, not a trait of your mothers I swear) and fall down or bonk your head often. Your pediatrician assured me "we worry about the kids without bruises on their legs!' That made me feel a lot better. You got a tricyle from you nana & grandpa last week, and you're already learning to push the pedals with your feet, despite your legs being just a bit short to move the bike very far. My oh my how you change everyday!

Your talking a bit, although you still prefer sign language over verbal language. You have a good dozen or more verbal words you use frequently, but you probably say at least 20-30 signs. You also love to make animal noises, fart noises (!), and copy us when we cough, sneeze, laugh, etc. You do a lot of babbling, having full-blown conversations using your own little language. Oh how I wish I knew what you were saying.

You absolutely love the animals. Each morning when we let out the dogs and collect eggs, you say "hiii!" and "thank you" to the chickens for their eggs, unprompted - & each time, I melt. You constantly hug & kiss the dogs, and try to love on the antisocial cats as well. You don't have a 'lovey' per se, but some of your favorite toys are balls, your wooden kitchen, a stuffed monkey, and a giant pooh bear. You also LOVE reading - some nights we read a dozen books before bed! Music is still another fav of yours as well. You're constantly rocking your head and dancing. This week you've discovered 'the hokey pokey' and love sticking your belly in and out, then go in circles while giggling uncontrollably. It's the best thing to witness ever!

You are still a little squirt for your age. I believe you were 23 lbs at your 18 month well visit, and 31 inches tall. I think sometimes you look younger than you are, hence the reason you get so many "awwww" and "oh my goodness!" when we're out and about and you're walking, talking, etc (plus you're cute, duh!).

You're eating three meals a day, with plenty of snacks in between. You got out of your meat phase at about 14 months, and now are loving the carbs (another mom trait). I still try to give you nourishing food for each meal, but sometimes you just won't have it - I swear your food preferences change day by day! Some of your favorites are blueberry, corn, banana, pasta, toast, plain yogurt, kefir, chicken, and every so often you'll surprise me by eating veggies. I will always be there to push the veggies, my love. ;) You're also nursing still, and show no signs of quitting (nor do you like any other forms of milk).

Sleep. Oh dear sleep! You aren't so fond of sleeping soundly since about 18 months. I think you're a bit frustrated with my low milk supply these days, and you're not filling up your belly as much before bed. So of course now you want to nurse, nurse, nurse all night long. I try late dinners, lots of liquids but you're still just wanting mom. I'm happy to be here for you but want you to get a good nights rest (and me too!). I think after we get back from Europe next month we'll work together to get you to wean from the boob at night, so we can all be more rested during the day. Hopefully by the next letter you're sleeping like a baby (ha, ha).

In other news - you're going to be a big sister in April if all continues well! Tonight you came up to me after your bath and said 'baby' while doing the sign for baby (cradling the arms). That's the first time you've ever said it, and we haven't even really talked it much with you yet. I took that as a sign. You're going to be the best big sister, I know it. You are always so content and happy around other children, and you'll be such a good role model. However I now know my mom was right - you'll always be my baby, even after the next comes along, even after you graduate high school and college, get married & have your own babies. And I feel eternally blessed for that.

Oh Hazel, I love watching you grow up.

Love,

Your momma (or as you call me while enunciating the 'o', "mom")

Category: Baby , Family , letter , Love , Nature

This moment:

Posted on | June 7, 2013 | 2 Comments

{this moment}

A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember. Inspired by SouleMama

Category: Nature , Oregon , Peace , Photography

Redwood Love

Posted on | May 25, 2013 | 2 Comments

Oh my friends, we had such a magical trip to the redwoods for my birthday at the beginning of this month. I had grand plans to share photos with you earlier but as soon as we got back we both jumped back into work, and then this week Hazel has been cutting four teeth (canines & molars, oww!) and she also has a pretty bad cold, which of course I caught. We are officially on the mend now, however. Hooray!

The weekend started off with a four hour drive to our destination - Jedidiah Smith National Forest in Northern California. We stayed with friends that live on the bank of the Smith River, and from their doorstep to the redwoods are just a few miles away.

Day 1 we got there in the late afternoon and it was an unseasonable 90 degrees outside, so all of us headed to the river to have a fire and roast some weenies on the beach. It was my birthday that day, and I was so full of joy and feeling so loved.

Day 2 we hiked to some of the largest redwoods, or so our tour guide (aka our buddy!) said. They were a bit off the beaten track and I wish the first photo below did it justice. Later that afternoon we headed to another friends house, they live 'off the grid' on the Smith River. We lounged on the beach most of the day, then ended the evening with brick fired pizza and home made ice cream by lantern. Another successful day!

Day three we were supposed to go home but we decided to stay just one more day. We woke that morning and went to stout grove, just the three of us. I'm not sure why but it was one of my favorite parts of the trip! Hazel hiked further than I've ever seen her hike before, and she was so in awe of all of the trees, pointing at each and every redwood.

Later that afternoon it rained, but we didn't let that stop us from doing one more hike.

Day 4 we headed home, but not before hitting up the beach! Brad went ocean fishing with his buddy that am and they caught a salmon, which we happily took home with us. I'm pretty sure the beach was Hazel's favorite part of the trip - she was sooo giddy, laughing and running on the sand! I think she loved the fact that she could run and if she fell it didn't hurt?

She found a hot wheel (above), which absolutely made her afternoon!

I will be surprised if anyone got to the end of this, and thank you if you did! Definitely put the redwoods on your bucket list if you haven't already.

...

Climb the mountains and get their good tidings. Nature's peace will flow into you as sunshine flows into trees. The winds will blow their own freshness into you, and the storms their energy, while cares will drop off like autumn leaves."

~John Muir

Category: birthday , california , Family , Nature , redwoods , toddler

Lovely Little Trees

an aesthetic voyager drawn to the wild, my sweet family along for the ride

Serendipity

Waiting:

This moment: Wishes

December 16

December 15

December 12

A letter: 19 months

This moment:

Redwood Love

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